"It was too beautiful for words. There, before me, was the cover of the Archie McPhee catalog. The photo was of an Alfred E. Newman look-alike wearing one of McPhee's most expensive and luxurious offerings: a Gourd King Hat!! (And a nifty item it was too, with its charming suede chin strap to hold it firmly on the head.) "
I was that supposed Alfred E. Newman look-alike. I don't think I look a thing like Alfred. I have no freckles and I worry all the time. The only version I can find of the picture is this tiny icon. I leave the final judgement to you. I do look like an idiot.