David is thinking about the meat faerie (zoomardav) wrote,
David is thinking about the meat faerie
zoomardav

I'm not a wino...

Did you ever tell a story without realizing how strange it would sound to other people until after you'd told it?

I was in a conversation, not surprisingly, about the difference between winos, tramps and hoboes.

I had what I thought was a funny story that illustrated some distinction. It went something like:

There used to be a homeless guy that lived in the park near our house that I was friendly with. He loved Roscoe, so I would always stop and chat with him. One day, he had these horrible red, welt-like sores on his arms, face and neck.

I said, "Geez Chuck, did you sleep in spiders?"

He said, "That's what I thought after what happened to Tommy, but when I went to the doctor he told me these were wino sores."

Tommy had actually slept in some kind of weird spider's nest, his phrase not mine, and ended up in the hospital.

"Wino sores," I asked.

"Yeah, I guess you get them from drinking too much wine. Shows you what an asshole he is, I never drink wine."

Anyway, that's the punchline to the story. But, all I got were a bunch of questions about how strange all the details in the story were. At the time, it didn't strike me as strange at all.
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