The Ghost of Gene Siskel: Famed movie critic struck down before his time at the age of 53. He now lives in a the empty case of a Star Trek 6: The Undiscovered Country DVD that I misplaced.
A Really Positive Flea Name Jack: He lives on Roscoe and always looks on the bright side of any problem.
Yoshi The Very Wise Retired Gay Ninja: He lives under our kitchen sink dispensing pearls of wisdom and sensible fashion tips.
Googly the Genius Fairy With All the Answers: Googly may not be big, but he's a genius when it comes to knowing stuff. He also has magic powder that ends conversations that have gone on too long, masks halitosis and makes you invisible to Scientologists.
I hope this works out a bit better.